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Ookademus "Ookman" Mahoney Below are the 10 most recent journal entries recorded in the "The Adventures Of A Teenage Plushie!" journal:

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April 13th, 2009
12:09 am
[ookademus]

[Link]

This Just In...
Thee Ookman is still watching you.

Current Mood: Big Brother

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October 16th, 2008
12:16 am
[ookademus]

[Link]

Bittersweet Resolution
I've reached the conclusion that people generally do not know what they want, and if you do, you get shot down in the cross fire if you're on the receiving end of that smoking gun. Well guess what? I've been continuously shot down, but the difference between me and some stumblefuck is this: I REFUSE TO LIE DOWN AND TAKE IT WITHOUT A FIGHT!

Because of this realization, I have learned that I am all I have at the end of the day so I better make it as amazing as possible. I'm tired of empty promises, misguided communication and lies. Don't fuck with me people, I fuck back.

I hear so much talk and so little action. I see so many females of the same caliber as myself; actually females that supersede what I've worked 37 years to aspire to, better themselves in ways that amaze and inspire me, and I think why can't a man pony up? I know of one and that's my beloved, Eric. No fear, just self awareness. He should give seminars to help lead the flock not discourage them.

I want to bitchslap more then half the populous and scream like a drill Sargent, "Wake the fuck up!" Opportunity knocks once. True love knocks once. A solid career knocks once. You hear that at your door you better answer it, embrace it and fuck the ever loving hell out of it. Never let it go. Cease the moment and ride bitch.

I'm tired of fighting the good fight trapped in a world of displaced motherfuckers that don't know who the hell they are and can't set aside their egos and pride to save the day. I have news for you children: SWALLOW IT!

Seriously, if we all recognized the symptom of our inner self we'd all have a solution on how to deal and react to the world and the people within it.

This has been your self motivational speech for the evening. Change yourself. Change the world.

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October 15th, 2008
09:37 pm
[ookademus]

[Link]

Dear Mama:
Today marks the two year deathiversary of your passing, and although I manage and cope with this intense heartache every day, you are someone I will never get over or passed.

You were more than a mother to me. You were my Best Friend for 35 years. Your love is branded on my heart and your memory is etched in my mind, and that's the part I am eternally grateful for. Without you there would be no me, and because of that, I will fight and scratch my way out of this paper bag and make you proud of me.

One day we will meet again, m'friend. Until then, keep the coffee warm and help guide me through this labyrinth so I can find you safely. Your energy still gets me out of bed even on my worst days when I just want to throw in the white towel.

I miss you more then words can express, and I love you more then I've ever loved another human being. You're my number 1. You're my hero, little one.

Always and forever.

Your loving daughter,

-C

Current Mood: crushedcrushed

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February 14th, 2008
06:27 am
[ookademus]

[Link]

From: Ookman To: You


Happy, VD!

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January 22nd, 2008
06:52 am
[ookademus]

[Link]

Slap My Ass & Call Me Twinkie!


That's right, folks. It's a wedding cake made out of Hostess products.

Goodness, I can feel my hips spreading as I type this.

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December 23rd, 2007
09:05 am
[ookademus]

[Link]

H.U.S.T.L.E.R. (New Jack Style)
I'm laying on the couch last night with mom watching a movie since she's sick and has absolutely no voice. We hear a round of gunfire go off outside by our apartment window, she grabs me, we roll of the couch and we hit the carpet. Mom and I have watched New Jack City several times in our collective lifetime (not to mention she was born in Detroit and is affiliated with the sound of gunfire) and hear car wheels burning rubber. She's not stupid to stand up and pop her head out of the window yelling, "What's with all the noise, ma nigga?!" She knows her survival steps. I'll give her that much.

We hear several of our neighbors run outside to see what happened, the cops were notified, sealed off the area and found an empty clip near the dumpster that is several feet away from where we lay our heads at night. Considering we don't live in the ghetto part of Gilbert, all I can say is there goes the neighborhood. Probably some stupid white schmucks trying to be badass with their daddies gat and bitchin' Camero.

Merry fucking bust a cap in yo ass Christmas.

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November 22nd, 2007
12:32 pm
[ookademus]

[Link]

And A Word From Our Sponsor
Happy Ooksgiving, beeeeeeeeeoches!

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October 7th, 2007
12:55 pm
[ookademus]

[Link]

Dear Motherevol:


Happy birthday, Mom.


May your day be full of banana's and beer. Sushi and gingerbread cupcakes. Katamari and snoogles from your dear friend, Ook. I love you, but you need to stop drooling on me, or at least start wearing a drip pan over that extremely large maw of yours. *ponders potential birthday gift idea*

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October 4th, 2007
10:48 pm
[ookademus]

[Link]

Ladies & Gentlemen We Are Floating In Space
All I want in lifes a little bit of love
To take the pain away
Getting strong today
A giant step each day
Wise men say
Only fools rush in
Only fools rush in
But I, I cant help
I cant help falling
Falling in love with you

I will love you till I die
And I will love you all the time
So please put your sweet hand in mine
And float in space and drift in time

All my time until I die,
Well float in space just you and I
And I will love you till I die
And I will love you all the time
So please put your sweet hand in mine
We'll float in space just you and I

Wise men say
Only fools rush in
But I cant help
Falling in love with you

Current Mood: chilled

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September 15th, 2007
10:01 pm
[ookademus]

[Link]

Oldman
The wonderful thing about being a plushie is I see and hear all. Even when you think I'm just sitting on the bed staring vacantly out into space there’s something else transpiring behind these manufactured plastic brown eyes of mine. I have cuddled with the best and the worst of 'em. I have absorbed the tears, love and happiness of every single person I have come in contact with. I have consoled. I have supported. I have assisted you human filth for 6 long years.

I’m tired of being used.

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