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Ookademus "Ookman" Mahoney Below are 10 entries, after skipping 10 most recent ones in the "The Adventures Of A Teenage Plushie!" journal:

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September 6th, 2007
06:31 am
[ookademus]

[Link]

Death Of The Italian Round Boy
Pavarotti dead at 71? Great.

Now there's just Domingo and that other guy left singing my Christmas carols this year. Thanks for nothin' gods. Thanks a million.

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August 24th, 2007
02:46 pm
[ookademus]

[Link]

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

This is a pic of mom and my Uncle when they were wee. I'm sure mom got bitch-slapped after that picture was taken. She liked to antagonize her siblings just a smidge. Dumbass. .

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

The blonde terrorist is the nephew. Looks like someone else is following in mom's footsteps. What is up with you bipeds and hoses? Is this really your idea of fun?

*eats banana*

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August 19th, 2007
10:38 pm
[ookademus]

[Link]

Wuzza?


Man, I wouldn't be caught dead sharing my banana's and beer with these jocks. Still, sometimes the unsuspecting group of frat fuck chodes can surprise even the Ookman. It's like The Backstreet Boys pretending to be Jeff Buckley pretending to be Leonard Cohen.

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August 18th, 2007
10:41 pm
[ookademus]

[Link]

Hey Kids You Rock & Roll...Rock On!
Free Image Hosting at ImageShack.us

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August 15th, 2007
07:23 pm
[ookademus]

[Link]

Long Live Flat Eric


Built by Jim Henson's Creature Shop, Flat Eric was a low-tech, yellow puppet character from Levi's commercials for Sta-Prest One Crease Denim Clothing. He would ride with his friend Angel in California, wanted by the police. His name comes from an idea for a commercial that included having a car run over his head and flattening it. The idea was not used but the name stuck. He was featured in the music video for "Flat Beat" by French artist Mr. Oizo and he also appeared as a prop in series 1 of the 2001-2003 BBC comedy The Office. In 2004, he co-starred with David Soul in a TV advert for Auto Trader magazine. He was based on a puppet called Stephane that was similar but with ears. Stephane appeared in some short films by Mr Oizo. Flat Eric was made by Janet Knechtel for Creature Shop, in the UK and was performed by Drew Massey for all the Levis commercials.

Mom is addicted to this flat faced weenie eating moron. She told me Flat Eric was popular around 1999 and was seen in Levi ads and Mr. Oizo videos. She thinks we can make it big if I reenact all of FE's moves/commercials and post them on YouTube. Feh, everybody knows I have better dance moves than this sack. I know how to do The Sprinkler fer Christ’s sake.

Mom's Addiction...Collapse )

Current Music: Mr. Oizo: Flat Beat

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August 3rd, 2007
06:04 pm
[ookademus]

[Link]

Two Turntables & A Microphone
Since mom's washer decided to bust a nut on her, and the outdoor candle almost set fire to the outside patio last night (the fire extinguisher had to be used it got that bad), she decided it was time to make space for the lovely new USB turntable my new dad bought for her on their two year anniversary.

You heard me straight, folks. A USB TURNTABLE. Say it with me again child.

Do you know what that means? All those crates of old school punk/woozie indie shite she has been lugging around with her since the days of WSHJ radio can be converted to MP3 format directly to her PC.

I can hear a collective orgasm coming straight out of Chicago since I know how much those fools use to love coveting moms vinyl. Well guess what? It's back on the party bus and we're not sharing.

We're currently listening to this relic which was originally issued in 1979. Mom was eight years old jamming out to this nugget with her Dad. Heck, from what I gather, mom started listening to bands like Husker Du, Crass, Sex Pistols, Cocteau Twins and Sonic Youth when she was 10. White, punk and illegal, yo. She use to be cool.

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December 26th, 2006
03:17 pm
[ookademus]

[Link]

Five Year Old Plushie!
Happy birthday to me
Happy birthday to me
I look like a monkey...

And?

Not only was it Christmas yesterday, but that's the day my mom fell in love with me. I'm a special ooker like that.

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December 15th, 2005
10:38 pm
[ookademus]

[Link]

Curious George
It's about time that damn monkey got off his ass and started making movies.

He owes me a banana plantation off the coast of Costa Rica, a Visa platinum card and an endless keg party for all the debt I've covered from him.

Yeah, this monkey owns you now, bitch.

Current Mood: ookin' around

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August 16th, 2005
12:09 am
[ookademus]

[Link]

Whorin' In Mexico
Mom has been a total asshole to me lately. She revoked all my posting privileges after she came home last month to find me passed out drunk and naked lying in a puddle of my own stomach bile. I had an excessive amount of banana’s and beer that week and it just kinda caught up with me. C’mon, it’s not like Miss Technicolor Yawn herself can talk. I’m sure she can recall in recent times what a cold bathroom floor feels like.

Things got a little shaky on the home front for awhile. I started banging that skank monkey, Butta again and Mom just doesn’t approve of her. We decided to bail out of Arizona and get hitched at a drive-thru chapel on our way to Mexico. Fortunately for me, I sobered up long enough the next day to have that shit annulled. Besides, I turned that trick out and made her work her skank ass magic down by the pueblos. She rolled Monkey Boy a solid profit that I decided to invest in a banana boat. Talk about having a direct potassium hook-up. Hookers just rule until they get caught.

Needless to say, Butta got arrested and is in a Mexican prison. I have to slink back down there and bail the bitch out without Mom knowing what I’m up to. I told her that she is detoxing over Fat Bear’s apartment until I can devise a plan to spring the tart.

Women, sheesh. They’re only good for making me fried banana sammiches and swinging from my vine. Other than that, I’d rather be sucking down a few cold ones and playing Nintendo with my boys. I’ll take a hangover over a bitch headache any day of the week.

*hears foot tapping*

Uh-oh.

Okay Mom, I’m getting off the putter. See what I have to put up with? Gah!

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July 5th, 2005
02:37 pm
[m_fallenangel]

[Link]

Inquiring Minds
Ookman:

Haven't heard much from you lately. 'Sup?

Hope you're doing well, taking care of mom and squeezing in some bananas and beer.

Murph

(PS: The Mutt says 'woof!')

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